


Once More With Hallelujah

by oxnate



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Dogma (1999)
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Singing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-14
Updated: 2016-12-14
Packaged: 2018-09-08 11:10:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8842396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oxnate/pseuds/oxnate
Summary: Angels don’t sing. Until a demon gives Metatron the chance.





	

**Author's Note:**

> by Oxnate
> 
> Disclaimer: Do not own Buffy, Dogma, or Leonard Cohen (or his music)
> 
> Summary: Angels don’t sing. Until a demon gives Metatron the chance.
> 
> Notes: For the 2016 In Memoriam Challenge (crossover with people who passed away in 2016) Using 2 of Leonard Cohen’s original lyrics and 2 verses that I wrote myself. RIP Alan Rickman and Leonard Cohen.
> 
> A/N: Special thanks to deiticlast for Betaing.

Chapter 1. Once More With Hallelujah

Metatron looked down on Earth from Heaven and frowned. God was in the middle of a skeeball tournament again, this time in Florida, and The Plan was getting off track. Worse, the demon Sweet had now been summoned to the Hellmouth. Or perhaps he could use this? This demonic intervention would allow him to head back to earth and intervene, at least in a limited amount. Even better, he might even get to sing. Despite what certain Christmas carols might say, (and if he heard one more Glo-OH-Oh-oh Oh OH-Oh-oh- Oh OH-Oh-oh-oria he might just puke) no angel in all eternity had ever sung. The words to the shepherds were SPOKEN for Goodness’ sake.

He teleported himself as close as he could to the Slayer, but he would have to walk the rest of the way – the evil of the Hellmouth blocked anything short of direct Divine Intervention where he was walking. After walking a block, he turned around and found a trail of feathers following behind him, having dropped out of his coat. His wings were already wilting, another gift of the Hellmouth. He needed to hurry. Turning back to his destination, he broke into a run.

Spotting his destination just a little ways ahead, Metatron allowed himself to slow down and catch his breath. If he wanted to sing, he’d need to not be wheezing. This wasn’t normally an issue for the Angel, but again, the Hellmouth.

As he neared the Bronze, he heard Buffy Summer’s rather good singing voice belting out a song in a jarring, minor key.

“There was no pain,  
No fear, no doubt  
Till they pulled me out  
Of Heaven.

So that's my refrain.  
I live in Hell  
'Cause I've been expelled  
From Heaven.

I think I was in Heaven.”

“Ooh, an Angel? Here?” Sweet interrupted the Slayer’s song as Metatron walked in.

“Angel?” she asked as she turned to the open doorway. All the Scoobies also turned to look and while dark – and possibly brooding – the man in the doorway was not the ensouled vampire who was currently helping the hopeless in Los Angeles.

Sweet shook his head. “Not ‘Angel’. ‘An Angel.’ A supernatural messenger. Much like a passenger pigeon, or a giant, trained turkey.”

“Ooh, you mean like ‘Michael’?” Willow asked, excitedly.

Metatron scowled (it looked natural on him) even as Sweet smirked. “My name is Metatron.”

“Ooh. Sending the big guns, is She?” Sweet said. Then he started singing himself. “I've heard there was a secret chord  
That David played, and it pleased the Lord  
But you don't really care for music, do ya?  
It goes like this: the fourth, the fifth  
The minor fall, the major lift  
The baffled king composing Hallelujah.”

Everyone joined in on the chorus except Buffy, Sweet, and Metatron. “Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
Hallelujah, Hallelujah.”

Next, it was Buffy’s turn to sing again. “I did my best, it wasn't much.  
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch.  
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool ya.  
And even though it all went wrong  
I'll stand before the Lord of Song  
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah.”

Again, everyone joined in on the chorus except Buffy, Sweet, and Metatron. “Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
Hallelujah, Hallelujah.”

Finally, Metatron became the first Angel in history to sing. “Your faith was strong, you needn’t fuss  
T'was meant to be, in that, please trust  
You weren’t kicked out of Heaven, Hallelujah.  
You heard the call of your friends that night  
It was your choice to rejoin the fight  
With God, herself, proclaiming Hallelujah.”

This time, everyone joined in the chorus. “Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
Hallelujah, Hallelujah.”

Then it was the Scoobies’ turn. Xander went first. “Apparently, there’s a God above.”  
“Who likes the girl on gi-rl love?” Willow sang/asked.  
Metatron nodded and gave her a thumbs up. Willow did a fist pump in reply and held a hand out for Tara who high-fived her even as she sang her line, “And worries over how the world will treat ya.”  
“No matter what, we’re by your side,” Giles sang.  
“Even if you’re a demon’s bride,” Anya was always so reassuring.  
“Together we’ll proclaim our Hallelujah!” the Scoobies all finished together with Buffy joining in for the last, “Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah.”

Metatron turned and almost ran into the vampire, Spike, who’d been standing silently behind him. Whether you called his actions watching or stalking would depend on your point of view. Metatron spared a brief smirk at the demon before starting to walk away.

His smirk became an all-out smile when he felt himself singing the last lines along with everyone else even as he walked. He couldn’t stay on the Hellmouth much longer and still have the strength to get back to Heaven, but he’d accomplished his mission, which would only be good for Buffy, her friends, and the world. Buffy was now closer than ever to her human friends; and the vampire, Spike, was cast to the sidelines yet again.

As he reached the point he had entered the Hellmouth, he found himself instantly back in Heaven. After checking to make sure his wings were repaired, he looked back down and could see The Plan was back on track. He turned to return to the Lord’s throne room to wait for Her but found Her already standing behind him. She blessed him with a bright smile, nodded in approval of his actions, then headed back down to Earth. This time to Texas, for the next skeeball tournament.

**Author's Note:**

> Lyrics without other stuff:  
> Sweet:  
> I've heard there was a secret chord  
> That David played, and it pleased the Lord  
> But you don't really care for music, do ya?  
> It goes like this: the fourth, the fifth  
> The minor fall, the major lift  
> The baffled king composing Hallelujah
> 
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah
> 
> Buffy:  
> I did my best, it wasn't much  
> I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch  
> I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool ya  
> And even though it all went wrong  
> I'll stand before the Lord of Song  
> With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
> 
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah
> 
> Metatron:  
> Your faith was strong, you needn’t fuss  
> T’was meant to be, in that, please trust  
> You weren’t kicked out of Heaven, Hallelujah  
> You heard the call of your friends that night  
> It was your choice to rejoin the fight  
> With God, herself, proclaiming Hallelujah
> 
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah
> 
> Xander: Apparently, there’s a God above  
> Willow: Who likes the girl on gi-rl love? (Metatron nods and gives a thumbs up, Willow does a fist pump)  
> Tara: And worries over how the world will treat ya (Willow and Tara high five)  
> Giles: No matter what, we’re by your side  
> Anya: Even if you’re a demon’s bride  
> All: Together we’ll proclaim our Hallelujah
> 
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah  
> Hallelujah, Hallelujah


End file.
